Really sound to me as if SHE rules the roost. She is grumpy when you tell her not to get on the couch?? OMG. She needs more obedience and a firm kick in the arse if ya ask me. I wouldn't tolerate nipping and jumping up on me from any dog.
I did have one female that nipped my hands when around other dogs to get attention. With some behavior modifications and more individual attention she stopped. This doesn't sound the case with your girl.
Tell me, why get a "working type" mastino if you aren't intending to "work" her?
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