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Southern Security System

Follow these procedures to "adequately" secure your home from burglars.


1. Go to Goodwill and buy a pair of size 14-16 men's work boots.

2. Place them on your front porch, along with a copy of Guns & Ammo Magazine.

3. Put four giant dog dishes next to the boots and magazines.

4. Leave a note on your door that reads:


Bubba, Me and Marcel, Virgil, Erra, T-Bone, and Jimmy Earl went to the store for more ammunition, a case of beer, and a gallon of sweet tea. Be back in an hour. Don't mess with the pit bulls. They got the mailman this morning and messed him up bad. I don't think Killer took part, but it was hard to tell from all the blood. Anyway, I locked all four of 'em in the house.


Better wait outside. Be right back.

 

Cooter

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Replies (4)
  • Follow these procedures to "adequately" secure your home from burglars.


    1. Go to Goodwill and buy a pair of size 14-16 men's work boots.

    2. Place them on your front porch, along with a copy of Guns & Ammo Magazine.

    3. Put four giant dog dishes next to the boots and magazines.

    4. Leave a note on your door that reads:


    Bubba, Me and Marcel, Virgil, Erra, T-Bone, and Jimmy Earl went to the store for more ammunition, a case of beer, and a gallon of sweet tea. Be back in an hour. Don't mess with the pit bulls. They got the mailman this morning and messed him up bad. I don't think Killer took part, but it was hard to tell from all the blood. Anyway, I locked all four of 'em in the house.


    Better wait outside. Be right back.

     

    Cooter

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    • That's funny and would work.

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      • LOL... good one Gary

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        • hahahah!! love it! Tongue Out

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